Stupid Boys...

So things have been improving but I had some recent trouble that I don't want to discuss here. Instead I tell my story about the boys in my life.

Thursday night I went to the bar and had a few AMFs (love those drinks) and I told Mr. J that I wanted to go over to his house after the bar and play. About 30 mins later Nigel wanted to come home with me. (Nigel works at the bar and Mr. J bet me $50 I couldn't sleep with him in Septish and I did. Woo. And we have a few times since.) So I was like...hmm...I get Mr. J a lot so ill take Nigel home.

Wow. Mr. J flipped out. He got SO pissed. Granted I would be upset too but I thought he would blow it off and just say whateva. (He kinda has blown me off before). But he was PISSED. I have never seen him that mad, especially at me. So then I told Nigel I can't go home with him (cuz I would rather go home with Mr. J - didnt say this) he got mad too. WTF.

From my understanding these boys are my play pals, NOT anyone I am emotionally involved with or who I felt was emotionally involved with me. My boss, Red, told me that they BOTH have feelings for me and I can't juggle them around like that. That was complete news to me. Mr. J and I have been playing for years and we hang out 3-4 week. Nigel and I have been playing around for about 3-4 months and playtime is not very often.

So, it was a surprise to me that Red told me they were jealous. Kinda of exciting but kinda of weird. So I told Mr. J I was sorry and that I would come over and he said no. :(

I went home by myself.

Friday morning, I call Mr. J and said sorry about last night and I don't remember much. And he was still upset with me and said we are still friends but no more play pals. Which will probably last a week or so. So hopefully things can patch up and I can figure out if he or Nigel really have feelings for me.

Also, Big was at my house Friday morning while I was talking to Mr. J and he got upset about our conversation too. Big is the one boy I want SO SO bad and I can't have. And he has talked to ex's in front of me so I thought it was ok.

Oh and Nigel txt me and was like you can't act like that at my work if we are going to continue this. WTF. He always tells me we have a short shelf life. Boys.

I don't get them. They tell me one thing then get jealous. I like to thing I act more like a boy in that I can not have an emotional connection and then WAM they have one. Ugh. If you fuckin want me then man up and do it, otherwise we are just sex. Or just friends. If you can't be a man and be what I want and what you really want deep down then you have no right to get fuckin jealous. Stay tuned...

On a side note, I just saw the must precious commercial. This dude was saying how he wakes up in the middle of the night to watch his girl sleep. He then writes a note for her to find later in the day. It was SO fucking precious. I want a guy like that.

Ta ta
Ms. Pink Zebra